Don’t: Leave your cellphone in the shuttle on your way to the airport

Do: Make sure that the last person you called is a girl who when contacted by an anonymous stranger will FedEx said phone to you for the next morning

Don’t: Eat a huge late dinner and drink a bottle of wine the night before your flight

Don’t: Skip coffee at the airport

Don’t: Try and fly with a passport that’s been through the wash twice.

Do: Tell the security guard interviewing you that you like her cornrows

Don’t: Offer to start doing data entry the moment you walk through the door of your campaign office

Do: Ask your new Ohio dad to stop at Arby’s when he picks you up from work.

Do: you people know about horsey sauce?

That shit is fucking delicious.